How Can I Find Love?: Ask a Guy: Is It True That Guys Don’t Like Girls Who Are Smarter Than Them?

Thursday, 6 February 2014

Ask a Guy: Is It True That Guys Don’t Like Girls Who Are Smarter Than Them?

Dear Ethan,

I’ve been single for a really long time and I’m kind of confused as to why. My friends tell me it’s because guys don’t like girls who are smarter than them. Is this true?

Not true. So not true! Smarts are NEVER a bad thing – not in dating, nor in general. In fact, I personally find intelligence one heckuva turn on, and have gone out with plenty of ladies who I felt were smarter than me. So don’t ever think that brains are a hindrance to snagging a boyfriend – and don’t allow anyone else to tell you so, either.

Sure, there might be the occasional doofus out there who isn’t looking for any kind of mental stimulation. There will always be a handful of Hugh Hefner-wannabes out there only interested in snagging “trophy girlfriends.” But these guys are the exception to the rule.

Instead, what you’re more likely to have encountered are guys who are intimidated by your intelligence. Some dudes might feel embarrassed or nervous to approach you, given how eloquently you speak or how well you do in school. It’s hard enough asking a girl out – the task of impressing an especially admirable lady can be downright terrifying!

But an ideal suitor for a brilliant woman certainly doesn’t have to be packing the same intellectual heat she is. In any relationship, each partner will have different strengths and weaknesses, most of which will hopefully counterbalance one another. Having things in common is great, but going out with someone who sees and interacts with the world differently is often the most fulfilling part of any romance.

With that said, you also probably don’t want to go out with someone who can barely understand you – or worse, has no interest in listening to what you have to say in the first place. Such an incompatible simpleton might show you a fun time for a few weeks or months, but you’ll eventually tire of not being able to connect on any deeper level. Hold out for someone who has an appreciation for your wondrous abilities!

Good luck!
Ethan