5 Ways to Win Over His Parents

HOW TO IMPRESS
HIS PARENTS

Meeting your boyfriend's parents can be nerve-wracking. You want to impress them, but you don't want to seem like you're trying too hard. To leave the best impression and score a few points when you meet his parents, follow these tips.

DRESS APPROPRIATELY.

First impressions do matter, especially when you are meeting your boyfriend's parents. Your skirt shouldn't be too short (no more than an inch or two above the knee), and your top shouldn't be cut too low. The last thing you need is his mom telling everyone, "She dresses like a tramp." By the same token, keep your makeup simple, not overdone.
Keep in mind that dressing appropriately doesn't always mean dressing to the nines. If you are meeting at a casual restaurant or his parents always wear t-shirts and jeans, it doesn't make sense to wear a suit or fancy cocktail dress. Overdressing will make you seem snobby, while dressing too conservatively may make you appear uptight.
Talk with your partner about what he thinks is appropriate; get some insight into his parents' style, too.
Generally speaking, a sweater, knee-length skirt and low heels will work if you are meeting his parents in their home. Otherwise, dress appropriately for the location where you are getting together.

BAKE SOMETHING.

If you are heading to his parents' house for dinner, bake something to bring. If you can't bake, enlist a friend to come over and help you out. Cake, cookies or any type of goodies will impress.
Whatever you do, don't buy something from the local bakery and try to pass it off as homemade. His mom will know.

DO YOUR RESEARCH.

What type of work does his father do? What are his mom's hobbies? Where did your boyfriend grow up? Do your research so that you can bring up interesting topics (or at least participate in a conversation) about the family instead of talking incessantly about yourself. Going on and on about yourself will come off as conceited, no matter how great you are.

BE POLITE.

It goes without saying that you should be polite to your boyfriend's parents, but go the extra mile. Greet them with a handshake and a smile. Address them by Mr. and Mrs. _______, not their first names (check first that they share your boyfriend's last name, so you won't need to be corrected). Be complimentary to your boyfriend throughout the visit.
After the meal, offer to help with the dishes. Don't stay too late at their home, and when you are leaving, mention how much you've enjoyed meeting them. The next day, send a "thank you" note (yes, in the mail) for having you at their home.

MAKE AN OFFER FOR NEXT TIME.

Though they might not take you up on it, offer to take his parents out to dinner next time, or offer to cook for them at your place. Be sure to let your beau know that you are going to do this beforehand. Asking to take his parents out to dinner — your treat — will let them know you are financially secure (and not after their son's inheritance), while also hinting that you are going to be sticking around for a while.

http://www.sheknows.com/love-and-sex/articles/819138/5-Ways-to-score-points-when-you-meet-his-parents

5 Things You Should Know About Him Before You Move In

Moving in together is like getting engaged but without any jewelry. If you know me, you know that I don’t recommend a move without a ring. But if you disagree with me on that, at least take into consideration some things you should know about him before you move in together to make sure that it happens only once and only with the right guy. 

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His finances

I know, money is an icky topic. And asking someone point blank if they have any debt and how they invest is a total nightmare conversation. But you know what’s a bigger nightmare? Having to call your boyfriend’s mom because he owes you $2,500 for covering his rent and utilities because he’s “in between jobs.” That happened to a friend of mine. It turns out that when she met him and he had a job, he was actually “in between unemployment stints.” He could never keep a job and was chronically in debt. She had no idea because for the six months they dated, he was employed and seemed to be doing fine. There was no way for her to know unless she asked, and she didn’t. So take a lesson from my poor friend (who never got the money back, not even from his mother) and have the yucky conversation to avoid a yuckier situation.

His cleaning habits

Picking up your dude’s dirty underwear gets very old very quickly. If you’re a neat freak and he’s Oscar the Grouch personified, your living situation is going to be full of resentment and fights. And that also goes for if you’re a messy person and he’s Mr. Clean. Does it mean that it can’t work between a hot mess and a neat freak? No. But it’s only going to work if you talk about it and set some serious boundaries and rules that you both agree to.

Your relationship

He asked you to move in with him! He thinks you’re the one! Start subscribing to those bridal magazines! Not so fast, sister. Has he actually said that to you? Don’t assume anything. In a perfect world, yeah, he wants to move in with you because he sees it as a step forward in your relationship. But people aren’t always perfect. Or really ever perfect. He could be doing it for financial reasons, for convenience, because he’s lonely. Talk about where he sees your relationship going first and make sure you two are on the same page as far as what moving in together actually means.

His future

Here’s another crap-tastic question I’m telling you to ask your man: What’s his five-year plan? I know what you’re thinking, “This is a relationship, not an interview, Patti!” But you need to know where he’s planning on going before you hitch your wagon to his ride. Just be sure that you both see the same future or at least the same gist of a future. You don’t need to know all the details, but you do need to feel like you can be happy and satisfied in his gist of a future and that it hazily looks like your gist of a future.

His ideal weekend

Going from dating to living together is a big jump. As is going from “practically” living together to actually living together. Find out what he enjoys doing when you’re not around. Another tale from the friend crypt: One of my girlfriends knew that her man was into video games, but until she moved in, she didn’t know that he spent every waking minute he wasn’t on dates with her playing them. It led to some ugly fights, and let me tell you that in the battle of woman vs. video game, woman rarely wins.

Who here has moved in with someone recently? What’s the biggest lesson you learned?

http://www.pattistanger.com/things-you-should-know-about-him-before-you-move-in-together/

How to Tell If You're Dating Prince Charming or Prince Harming

According to ancient philosopher Aristotle, there are three kinds of relationships, only one of which will bring you true happiness. Find out how your relationship measures up!

1. Relationships of Pleasure
Partners who are about sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll. You share soulless, passionate sex and playful banter—but they're about the body or ego. They never soul-nurture you with insight and growth, so they never bring real-deal happiness.

2. Relationships of Utility
Partners you spend time with in hopes of garnering status, power, money and beauty like the rich guy with a trophy girl. Again, this is about body or ego and doesn't bring true joy.

3. Relationships of Shared Virtue
Partners who challenge and inspire you to grow into your highest potential and nurture your soul. A good example is when Jack Nicholson's character in As Good As It Gets says, "You make me want to be a better man." When you prioritize seeking a partner who supports you becoming your best self—instead of crushing on "superficial lures"(hotness, funniness, smartness, success, etc.)—you wind up with a soul mate/a Prince Charming/a definite keeper!

With this in mind, if you want to be happy in love, you must take time to see past a guy's "superficial lures" and look inside his "superinsidehimself." Unfortunately, those fumes of chemistry can often dizzy a gal into making stupid love choices. That's why it's important to remember: Hot, steamy chemistry eventually fades—and what's always left beneath is a person's true soul.

Yes, if you want to be happy, you must seek a good-hearted, ethical soul who brings you great growth—not simply a hottie who brings great grope!

Confession time: Another superficially alluring quality I've been suckered in by is humor. I am Silly Putty in a friggin' funny man's hands. I once had a boyfriend who teased me that the secret to getting me into bed was to crack five good jokes in a night. He'd count down his jokes as the night progressed. Unfortunately, funniness is a mere decorative quality —sometimes developed to avoid talking about real-life issues. Which is why in the past, after a few months of dating a friggin' funny guy, I've witnessed all that fabulous ha-ha-ha laughter often gives way to tears when the guy's true character—true soul—shows up as one that avoids honest communication, warm empathy and the desire for growth. Then, when I try to connect soul to soul—heart to heart—I am greeted by a gigantic, unmovable whoopee cushion wall.

Basically, friggin' funny is only the tiniest tip of a person. Meanwhile, a person's soul is a person's foundation!

For the record: Aristotle wasn't against finding someone friggin' funny or friggin' sexy or friggin' rich. He believed these pleasure-bringing qualities were good for stirring up passion, which humans need to be our fullest selves! But Aristotle recognized "superficial lures" and material goods were simply what he called "means to the ends" of happiness, not "the final ends," which is always to grow into your most esteemed self.

As Aristotle said: "Men imagine the causes of happiness lie in external goods. That is as if they were to ascribe fine and beautiful lyre playing to the quality of the instrument rather than the skill of the player."

Or as I like to say, "It's just as easy to complain about a rich man as it is to complain about a poor man."

Basically, it doesn't matter how rich a guy is if his behavior makes you twitchy and miserable.

While on the subject of money, Aristotle was no fan of slackers either. He recognized that being or dating poor brought its share of problems. He even admitted the lack of a certain amount of wealth was as much an obstacle to happiness as deprivation of freedom. He gladly accepted that some wealth was needed to be happy—just as exciting bodily pleasures were needed. But again, wealth and bodily pleasures were mere means to the ends of happiness—these ultimate ends being to nourish your soul, so you can reach your most esteemed level of self.

A big secret to happiness? Stop focusing on finding a Mr. Right! Start focusing on finding Life Plan Right. When a Mr. Potential Right comes along, you must ask yourself if this guy will lead you to Life Plan Right or Life Plan Wrong.

As you get to know the guy, look to see if he:
1. Offers you exciting growth as well as exciting grope
2. Has developed good character—so he'll be a positive influence on your character development.

If the guy scores two for two, you're likely in Prince Charming territory.




http://www.oprah.com/relationships/Are-You-Dating-Prince-Charming-or-Prince-Harming/4

14 Ways to Keep Romance Alive

Did you know that August is Romance Awareness Month? It's actually pretty easy to remember since Mother Nature drops a not-so-subtle hint by turning up the heat outside. For married couples, at the top of the list for reasons for divorce are things like money issues, infidelity, sexual problems, and boredom. In today’s climate of infidelity, couples have to realize that love is not the only key to a successful marriage. There are a number of things to remember and romance is just one of them.

Take time out and think about what you may or may not be doing and begin to heat things up in your everyday life with your sweetie. Here are 14 tips to keep you busy and satisfied for August Romance Awareness Month and beyond.

1. A romantic bed picnic. Reconnect! Stop by your local grocer and pick up chopped fruit, chocolate sauce or chocolate bars to put in a melting pot for dipping. You can also pick up your favorite cheese and crackers—it’s brie for me please! Once you get home, now you are ready to set the mood in your room. Light candles, load up the CD or Mp3 player with some great jazz or your favorite love songs, and spread out a blanket on the bed. Spend the evening simply talking like you may not have in a long time.

2. Speak love for 30 days. Send a different sexy, loving message each day. Mix it up, send a text one day and leave a voicemail message the next day.

3. Take a bubble bath together. Once a week take a romantic bubble bath together—pick a day and work it into your schedule. Light candles and sprinkle in rose petals for an added dash of romance. Oh, and don’t forget to lose your personal inhibitions ladies, you know the ones about the "extra" inch or two you may have. Self confidence goes a long way.

4. 30 Reasons why you love one another. Write each reason on a separate piece of paper. Put them in separate boxes and pull a different one each day, to brighten your day and remind you of your love for each other.

5. Memory lane. Sit down with a glass of your favorite bubbly and take a rummage through your photo albums together and remember the good times.

6. Reading is fundamental. Turn off the TV, computer and phones. Take turns reading poetry or poems to one another.

7. Sundae love. This may sound corny, but order one large sundae or banana split with two spoons and feed one another. It is very sexy and romantic. There is something special about sharing.

8. Plan a weekend getaway during the month. Spend the night in a local hotel for a change of scenery, or stay the entire weekend if you can. Call us to create an atmosphere of ambiance for you to relax, relate, renew and enjoy the sunrise together.

9. Play to win. Play a romantic game of Twister, truth or dare, or "strip Scrabble" with your spouse. Each time a player earns 50 points, he or she must remove a layer of clothing. The person with the most clothing still on at the end wins—then again, there are no losers in this game.

10. Treat yourselves. Hire a masseuse and have his and her professional massages at home.

11. Flower power. Bring a different kind of flower home each day for 30 days. Trust me it is not difficult. There is such a variety of flowers to choose from and your local florist would love to help you.

12. Slow it down. One of my favorite slow jam lyrics provided by the late great Teddy Pendergrass, goes "Turn out the lights, light a candle." Load up your favorite slow song and have a private dance together. Your kitchen, bedroom or living room make the perfect dance floor. You can even surprise your spouse by putting the music on, grab them and begin to take the lead.

13. The power of a love letter. Write a love letter or share something you are really proud of your spouse for. A few ideas you can write about are: an accomplishment, a selfless act of kindness, what you love the most and why. Ladies seal it with a kiss and a dash of his favorite perfume. Guys, a spritz of her favorite cologne will do.

14. A late night stroll. Go for late night walk under the stars and enjoy the breezy night amidst the calmness. Hold hands and stop for long kisses. It’s the little things done with love from the heart that keep you connected and the romance alive



http://www.hitchedmag.com/article.php?id=1214.

6 Secrets to a Great Long Distance Relationship

Traditionally long distance relationships have been unlikely to last beyond 6 months, but in the age of the internet, Skype and mobile phones they have more chance than ever of being successful. The challenges facing people engaged in a long-distance relationship are unique. It can take more careful planning, time and attention than a traditional relationship but if you are both committed to making it work there is no reason why it can’t be just as fulfilling and satisfying as any other relationship. To give your long distance relationship the very best chance of success here are our top 6 secrets.

1.      Creating clear parameters

Early on you both need to decide where you would both like this relationship to go. This will happen in a traditional relationship but there isn’t the same urgency. If you are going to invest time and effort in keeping in contact; money travelling to visit each other and emotional energy in establishing a bond over a distance you want to know early on that you are both heading in the same direction. Are you going to give it 6 months of you both giving it your very best shot and then get together to review how it is going? Are you working towards living together one day?  Do you know what level of commitment the other person wants from you and whether you can give it?

You don’t need to make all these decisions straight away but you do need to both have the ability to say what you want and need and articulate how you are feeling as the relationship goes on.

2.      Keeping regular contact

In order to make a long distance relationship work you need daily contact so that you become part of each other’s daily lives. This is easier than it used to be with the internet and Skype – no more huge phone bills!

Talk on the phone or online; write emails; send love letters; Skype or instant message – it is all great for your developing relationship but even the most talkative of people might run out of things to say. Try doing things together – watch a film at the same time and then talk about it; play Scrabble, chess or some other online game; learn a language together and then practice your skills while planning a trip to that country – there are no end of things you can engage together in online which will give you plenty to talk about every day and deepen your bond and connection with each other.

3.      Have face to face contact – as much as possible

Although you can develop a great virtual relationship it is really important that you set regular dates to meet up and see each other face to face. The physical contact of your partner is the glue that binds all the other things together – the smell of their skin; the touch of their hand; the kisses that say more than words ever could – it is vital to the success of the relationship that these meetings happen. When one visit has ended plan the next so you both have something to look forward to.

4.      Develop trust

Trust is the cornerstone of all healthy and lasting relationships but it is particularly important when it comes to long distance relationships – there is so much distance between you it is easy to become insecure or unsure about your partner’s commitment. This is why having clear parameters and daily contact is so important. It’s unrealistic to think that you won’t both get insecure at different times but if you are in daily contact you will be able to talk about how you are feeling rather than having days or weeks feeling unsure and insecure.

5.      Nurture security

Feeling secure in a relationship comes from being really clear with each other about what is happening and where you are going. Firm plans, definite times arranged when you will meet online; a willingness to talk about the future and, most importantly, an agreement that if it isn’t working you will tell each other – all of these things will create the security you need in order for your relationship to survive and thrive.

6.      Have an attitude of gratitude

Many long distance relationships don’t survive because the distance between them becomes a painful experience and when the couple talk it is about how awful it is that they can’t be together, how much they miss each other and how difficult it all is. Watching your partner suffer emotional pain is horrible and will lead some people to conclude it is better to finish it rather than prolong the agony.

When you talk try to focus on what is great about your relationship and although it will be painful at times don’t wallow in it or you might risk losing them altogether.

http://www.eharmony.co.uk/relationship-advice/relationships/2012/10/6-secrets-to-a-great-long-distance-relationship#.UgoCHpK1Hnc

What Women Want From Men

                                                                                                                      

Today’s women have achieved more than their great grandmothers could have ever imagined. Women are in politics, women are in space; women are excelling in every career imaginable. Women today are strong, independent and sexually liberated; Gloria Steinem would be proud.

Despite the female's social evolution, however, you may be surprised to learn that women actually still enjoy being treated like women, and they still appreciate a little chivalry now and then. Cliche as some of these tips sound, they will score you big points with any lady who enjoys being treated well.

What Women Want…

Return her messages

Many women gauge a man’s interest level by how long it takes him to respond when she contacts him. If his response time is poor, she might assume he’s just not that into her. Now, it’s no secret that women and men have differing opinions on what constitutes good communication, and we’re not saying you need to drop everything the minute she calls. She knows you’re a busy man; she’s busy too. What women want from men is a call back as soon as they’re able, as opposed to sometime the following day. This doesn’t mean you have to send an e-mail or a text of epic proportions if you don’t have time; a sentence or two will suffice to make her feel like you care -- which is all she really wants to know.

Kiss her for no reason

As much as they love sex, women also enjoy a nice, deep kiss that doesn’t have any strings attached. This serves two purposes: It lets her indulge in kissing for the sheer pleasure of it, and it also tells her you want her, and not just sex. Yes, you’re charming and sexy and she loves being naughty for you, but sometimes she needs a different type of connection. To really do what women want from men, try a surprise kiss for no reason at all; she’ll love you for it. Combine this with a little hand-holding and she’ll be smiling for days.

Dance with her

Simply put, dancing with a woman makes her feel special. Unfortunately, most men are reluctant to put their dancing shoes on, especially in a public setting. Guess what? While she’d probably welcome the idea, you don’t need to visit a nightclub to dance with your woman. She’ll be just as thrilled if you slipped a little Marvin Gaye on and danced with her in the living room. This would actually be to your advantage, as you have total control over the music. You’re also conveniently located if the dancing starts to get dirty…

Dress up for her

Dressing up to take your woman out is an excellent way to impress her. It’s not about the clothes; it’s about the fact that you find her worth dressing up for. It lets her know that you think she’s worth that kind of effort. Besides, a nice shirt and dress pants can increase your sex appeal by leaps and bounds; you may feel overdressed, but your hotness factor will have magnified exponentially. It’s true what they say: Women really do love a sharp-dressed man

Remember random milestones

As a rule, birthdays and anniversaries should always be remembered; forgetting something of this magnitude will send the message that you don’t find her terribly important. After all, she probably memorised yours early on in the relationship, so if hers goes unnoticed, she’ll be utterly heartbroken. Here's how to do what women want from men: To truly impress her, aim to remember the insignificant dates, as well as the big ones. The first time you told her you loved her, the first time you kissed, the first place you vacationed together, what she was wearing the first time you met -- any one of these will turn her to jelly and score you more bonus points than you can shake a stick at.

Take on an activity with her

What women want from men is to spend time with their man outside of the bedroom. They want to experience life with their man, and this is one of the best ways to develop a three-dimensional relationship. Don’t worry; we’re not recommending you join her yoga class; rock-climbing, hiking, tennis or cycling are activities both of you can enjoy. If neither of you are the sporty type, try something else that you already excel at. Teach her how to swing a 9-iron or school her in the art of dart throwing -- she’ll love the personalised attention.

Propose a visit to her family

Women love it when a man gets along with her friends, but she simply adores it when he gets along with her family. Even if you’re not particularly fond of her busybody mother and father, suggesting a visit (even just a yearly one) can really make your woman’s day. It lets her know you recognise the importance of family. This is truly the kind of suggestion that leads to a warm and fuzzy feeling, so don’t be afraid to suggest it.

It's the little things…

When it comes to what women want from men, the little things really do matter. The items on this list aren’t particularly difficult or time-consuming, but they are, unfortunately, very often overlooked by men. This often leads a woman to feel neglected, which in turn leads to nagging and other problems. Make her feel special, and she’ll go to the ends of the earth for you; try one of these suggestions, and she’ll feel like you've already gone there and back for her.

http://uk.askmen.com/dating/heidi_200/202b_dating_girl.html

10 Ways to Get Him to Open Up to You

• Do you ever feel like a CIA agent trying to break a suspect? Ease up a little, skip the "What are you thinking?" line, and give these tricks a shot instead.

  
  

  "I'm going to get a beer. You want one?"

  You're not plying him with alcohol; you're leveling the playing field and doing something relaxing together. (Of course, the booze doesn't hurt.)
  
  

  • "If you feel like talking, I'm here."

    Seem obvious? Then how come you never say it? Forcing him to talk about an issue right here, right now, will make him feel condescended to and powerless, things guys don't enjoy (unless we're naked and there's a safeword involved). Let him know he can come to you.
    
    

  • "What was your high school like?"

    Which is actually code for "What was high school like for you?" Which itself is code for "Tell me about your lingering insecurities and tender spots." Bam.
    
    

    • "I think the reason we're having this fight is..."

      Naming the argument can slow its momentum, help you both relax, and lower the stakes. All of a sudden it becomes a discussion of deeper issues.
      
      

      • "God, that was ah-ma-zing. [Pause.] Can I ask you something?"

        You just came. He's full of confidence. Great time for a heart-to-heart. Seriously—try it.
        
        

        • "Tell me about the summer you and your dad built that deck."

          Or any question that gets at his feelings about his parents. Because relationships are like chess, and you're now a couple of moves from knowing if/when he wants kids. Well played, madam.
          
          

          • "I think we've been spending too much time at bars lately. Once a week I'd love for us just to stay in."

            My friends in relationships often complain that their girlfriends or wives are "just generally mad." But raising an actual issue, and a solution, can start the discussion on a positive note and prevent him from curling into a defensive crouch.
            
            

            • "Your package looks great in those pants."

              A girlfriend once said this to me, and she was able to get whatever she wanted for the rest of the day—information, money, sexual favors. I'm not saying you should lie, but there's nothing wrong with starting with a genuine compliment that goes right to where his aspirations lie.
              
              

              • "Hey, how'd that Q4 meeting go?"

                So much better than "How was your day?" You're remembering something he's mentioned before and showing genuine concern. Nicely done.
                
                

                • Or just say, "I'm going to meet the girls. We can talk about it later. It's all good."

                  And mean it.
                  
                  
                  
                  
                  http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/2013/02/10-ways-to-get-him-to-open-up-to-you#slide=10

The Secrets Men Keep

We like to cuddle. 
Cuddling is all about mood and ambience. It's peaceful to lie in someone's arms in the dark with great music or even the low buzz of the TV (although that tends to distract me) in the background. It's nice to hear nothing but your lover's breath against the backdrop of the evening or early morning. Holding someone close in bed also makes you feel very secure with one another and the relationship.

We think we are good in bed. 
Men are taught that confidence solves just about anything. You can be making a total mistake, but as long as you're confident, it will turn out okay. This may explain why we are so clueless at what we are doing in bed, but we act like we know.

Getting too tipsy on a date is a turnoff. 
Some people turn into a completely different person when they are drunk. Let the other person learn about you while you're sober, before you get wasted with them. Alcohol should be introduced into the relationship slowly, but if a drink or two takes the edge off, and wine adds romance it's fine. Just don't push it too far.

Heavy makeup is a turnoff.
 I've always been the type of guy who appreciates a natural look as it is, and when a girl does her makeup well, the results can be magical. But the one thing that should never happen is excessive application: too much, too many colors, or if it's just a botched attempt at a good makeup technique. Seems like as time goes by, makeup makes like the earth and erodes and changes with weathering. There is nothing more ghastly than makeup run amuck in the morning after spending the night together.

We put pressure on ourselves to get married. 
Women tell me that they feel more pressure to settle down because they can't have children as easily past a certain age. I don't feel pressure in that sense, but I do fear that my appearance and my "game" (not that either are working for me presently) will fade as I get older. It's fun being one of the few guys in my group of friends who hasn't yet found love, but at the same time I wonder what is wrong with me...and I'm trying to decide if time is running out. I'm so far behind, I can't imagine being asked to meet on Sunday for brunch by a girl I've dated for a month, much less having a child or being married.

We want to bail the morning after a one-night stand.
 Do not linger in bed hung over. I'm foul when I'm hung over, so I am sure others are too. You can't contaminate someone's bed with that. Do everything you can to get home and fester in your own bed. People have things to do over the weekend. Give each other a hug, wish each other well, don't say anything about calling, and don't believe him when he mutters that he will call you.


You'll never understand our sports obsession.
 I know some women love sports. But are they as obsessed with sports like guys are? I read about sports every day, and go over stats. And I do find myself telling my sisters about University of Virginia and Boston College teams — where they went to school. There is no reason women wouldn't understand or know sports like guys do if they were as obsessed. I just think guys across the board are more sports-obsessed than women are.


You're not the only one who engages in retail-therapy post-breakup. 
I have shopped during emotional low points. Wearing new clothes makes me feel confident. There is also a social aspect of shopping because you are usually with friends, consorting with other shoppers and salespeople. You've been spending a lot of money on your ex in the past; now it's time to spend some money on you.

Sex in the shower is overrated.
 I once tried this, but the entire time I was trying to contort my body so that I could get everything inserted correctly. That "up against the wall" variation is tougher than it sounds. The entire shower apparatus is so slippery, and then you have soap all over the place. It's a danger zone. Plus, I do my best to keep my bathroom clean, but I don't think I'd ever want to have sex anywhere near something called "mildew."

We do think you're crazy sometimes, but only because it makes things easier for us. 
Once I accepted that women were "crazy" (many older guys had insisted they were for years), it seemed to take a huge load of pressure off me. No longer was I trying to rationalize moves that women made that got me into crazy analysis cycles. When I just throw it all out the window and dismiss it as "crazy," it makes it easier to deal. We don't really think women are insane, we just say it so we can be done thinking about their antics and move on.

Leave your baggage at the door.
 Guys are happy to help out their girlfriends with emotional issues. But if the baggage becomes apparent too early in the relationship, then a guy will probably bail. Also, baggage causes people to put pressure on or damage a relationship, so it may be doomed from the outset.

We are afraid of commitment. 
Commitment means that I've decided that the woman I'm settling down with is perfect and there is no one else out there for me. Commitment means I've found my soul mate, that I am completely secure with myself, and that there should be no going back. I don't know about you, but all of that is pretty heavy. I think the old adage "Girls mature faster than boys" comes into play here. Commitment is a sign of maturity, and it just takes some of us longer.


Confidence is key in the bedroom. 
I know if a girl seems unsure of herself in bed, it gets distracting and starts to feel awkward. The best thing to do is to act like you have some experience, and not question anything. I think back to the advice my dad once gave my sisters and me when he snuck us onto the "premium members only" tennis courts at this fancy resort at the beach. While we played, security goons watched closely, and my dad could tell that we were nervous: "Just act like you are supposed to be here, and they won't ask any questions." Sure enough, it worked.

Sometimes, we do blame your bad mood on PMS.
 But if we're smart, we just don't say it. Honestly, sometimes a woman's anger does look hormonal. I have said something to a girl one day that she laughs at, but then a week later she bites my head off when I say the same thing. But I've learned not to make things worse by suggesting that she's PMSing.

We get jealous because we're insecure.
 If a guy feels like he does not deserve a woman or is not good enough for her, he will become jealous easily and worried that he's going to lose her to another guy. On the other hand, I admit that I have tried to make girls I'm interested in jealous on purpose before.

We hate when you try too hard to be one of the guys. 
It's pretty lame that my buddies and I invent words and languages and then giggle over them like schoolchildren. But what's even lamer: when some outsider tries to use the language, without the ability to contribute. That's what one of my old girlfriends did. My friends and I would discuss how she was trying to speak like us, and it got to the point where I bristled every time I heard her speak one of our made-up words.

We play hard to get — and we know it. 
Sometimes, I just act like they have no chance, even though I might like them. I openly flirt with other girls in front of them, and talk about how hot other girls are in front of them. I make myself look really picky and difficult to get to. Then, I get really tender and give all of my attention to this girl who thought she had no chance.

Sometimes We Like Being Told What to Do

One of the reasons we won't commit is because we don't want to be told what to do. But, it's no secret that we don't like to think, and we struggle with details. So when you tell us clearly what to do, how to do it, and map it out for us, we can go about accomplishing a task without anxiety. Also, if we follow your directions precisely and you're still unsatisfied, then you're more unsatisfied with the directions you gave us, and not our execution of the instructions.

We Cry and Have Emotional Moments with Our Buddies

After my little sister's wedding, I talked over my feelings with a few of my guy friends. We might as well have been on the couch watching movies with a bottle of wine with the deep emotional things we were saying to each other. But it happens. And, we do cry — we just try not to do it in front of anyone. I shed tears when I think about old memories, or see something sad on TV, or a song hits me just the right way.

We Say We'll Call Even if We Don't Mean It

We always say we'll call, because it's the nice thing to say. It's almost as thoughtless as the "fine" answer when someone asks us how we're doing. Would you rather us say: "Look, I'm not planning to call you?" And sometimes at that very moment we say we'll call, we do mean it, but then after 24 hours we change our mind after sleeping on it.

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