5 Times Getting Back With Your Ex Is a Good Idea

Maybe we wish there was one, but there is no giant book that governs the way that we should act in a serious relationship. We've all been there: when things go sour and a breakup happens, it feels like your world is crumbling. With time you heal, you move forward, you meet other people. The harsh reality? Getting over an ex isn't easy. And sometimes, you don't have to.

I know, I know, getting back together with an ex has all sorts of nasty stipulations. So many questions pop up:If it didn't work out before, why will this be any different? Why now? The reality? Not all relationships end because one person deliberately hurt the other. Not all relationships end in tears.

Thus I present you with 5 times getting back together with an ex is a good idea.Seriously. 

1. The old issues are gone: Certain problems, like anger problems and issues that carry on from youth, aren't easy to overcome. However, if something like a problem at the office was putting intense pressure on your relationship and that is now a non-issue, this could allow you both to refocus in on the important stuff, AKA the both of you. 

2. You've forgiven him: Maybe he cheated (horrible). Maybe he moved on too quickly after you broke up (ouch). Maybe he just didn't give you the kind of attention you deserved because he wasn't OK with the kind of person he was. If you can find it in your heart to TRULY move on, then you can try again. If not, there's just no point.

3. You feel a void for their specific companionship: When you're in an intimate relationship, it's easy to consider that person your best friend for that period of time. When that person leaves your life, it's easy to feel something missing. The catch? When you try to fill that spot with someone else and it's just not the same. There's a high price to be put on being on the same mental level as someone else.

4. You TRULY could see yourself marrying him: Since the two of you have parted ways, you've compared every single man to this one guy. Not just their things like professions or their likes or dislikes -- but your potential future involving him. At the end of the day, if you really think this man could be the one, then you owe it to yourself to go for round 2.

5. It's the best sex you've ever had: OK, let me confirm that this is not THE reason to get back with someone. Sexual chemistry is different between every two people. But sometimes you just click the right way with someone, and that's something you can NOT deny.

Have you ever gotten back together with an ex? Did it work out for the best?

http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/155683/5_times_getting_back_with?ref=storiesweheart

Ten Great Things about Dating in Your 40s and 50s

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For those of you in your 40s or 50s who are recently divorced, widowed, or just eager to re-partner, dating again can be daunting. Perhaps it’s been a while since you’ve been “on the market”. You may want to think and act like a 25-year-old, but your seasoning tells another tale and may actually improve the chances for success.

The truth is that dating does change when you get older…and, in many ways, for the better. The paradox is that your maturity offers you many advantages over the youthful daters. Here’s why.

1. There is no ticking of the biological clock. Without the pressures of getting married and having children, you can enter into relationships for the “right” reasons, not because you are running out of fertile years.

2. Men and women in their 40s and 50s are generally more self-assured. They know what they want out of a relationship, what they are looking for in a mate and are not afraid to ask for it.

3. Your identity is more clearly defined. You are, therefore, more likely to depend on yourself, not your partner, to solve your own dilemmas.

4. You have learned from your previous relationship experiences. You can take inventory of what time has taught you so that you do not fall into old traps. Knowing yourself better and being able to size up others more skillfully gives you a big advantage.

5. You likely have greater financial freedom to enjoy fancy dinners and getaways. The days of scraping together enough money for a movie are over!

6. Romance is more enjoyable. You are more sexually confident and liberated than you were in your youth.

7. You have figured out what is important. You can put away the “list” of perfect characteristics that you are seeking in your date. Physical appearance, the type of car one drives and other status symbols take a back seat to more important personal attributes.

8. You have gained perspective. Not every aspect of your romantic life feels critical.

9. Your personal power is solid and secure. You have won and you have lost. You have made friends and let them go when they were not supportive. You can handle life’s ups and downs with grace.

10. As two independent people with separate lives, you are probably more capable than your younger counterparts to nurture the three entities needed for a healthy partnership; “I,” “You,” and “We.”

With enhanced self-awareness and father/mother-time on your side, there is a greater likelihood that you will make better choices, avoid previous destructive patterns, and build more lasting relationships. However, in some respects dating in your 40s and 50s is quite similar to dating in your 20s and 30s. The following are some common sense dating principles that apply across the generations.

1. Profit from your past mistakes. Know what baggage to check at the door. History has a way of repeating itself unless you mindfully replace your old dependencies and fears with new patterns of behavior.

2. Be proactive in creating opportunities. Whether you are engaging in online dating or joining a group where you will meet people with similar interests, don’t wait for something to happen.  Seek out as many opportunities as possible.

3. Recognize the power you have to be successful in your dating pursuits and use it. Seek out people who interest you, with eye contact, a smile or a simple “hello” rather than waiting for them to choose you.

4. Don’t waste time with people who don’t treat you well.

5. Even if you are not interested, be kind and respectful to people who show an interest in you.

6. Try not to focus heavily on the negatives. Not everything your date says or does will sit well with you. Try to see your potential partner as a whole person, recognizing the things you find endearing as well as the ones you see as negative.

7. Communicate. Silence is not always safe.  Don’t assume you and your partner see things in the same way or that your partner can read your mind. Take ownership of what is yours and communicate it honestly and directly.

8. Don’t assume the worst. Moments will arise when your judgment about your partner will be put to the test. Don’t be too quick to jump to conclusions. Like you, your partner is imperfect and deserves the benefit of the doubt.

9. Don’t rain on your partner’s parade. It is not possible that your “I” and your partner’s “I” will be perfectly compatible. Keep in mind that a good relationship is based on each person’s ability to be supportive of those differences.

Those of you in your 40s and 50s are in a wonderful period of your lives. You are beyond the confusion of your 20s and 30s and have clarified many of your major life values. Your priorities are in order and you know the benefits of being real. Go for it! You are in the driver’s seat!

What do you like about dating as you get older?

http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/ten-great-advantages-to-dating-in-your-40s-and-50s/#.UuWRBBDFKM8

Does a Big Age Difference Doom a Relationship?

He Said: It's my experience that maturity and age are two things that rarely co-mingle. Age does matter in relationships, and anyone that tells you otherwise is either in high school and has a crush on one of their teachers, is a Miley Cyrus fan, or worships Hugh Heffner. Age is the vehicle by which we experience common milestones in life. These milestones give us the ability to relate to one another. We all experience a first kiss, first partner, first sex, marriage, home, career, child, divorce, etc. If you're at the end of this list, what on Earth could you have in common with someone near the beginning? There is a reason that most couples today do not have a significant age difference. Consider that over the last one hundred years, the average age difference between married couples is 3.5 years. Coincidence? No. Call it what it is — a trend. 

When my divorce was final, I went out of my way to date women of different ages ranging anywhere from twenty-two to fifty-three years old. I found that with younger women, I felt attracted but bored. With older women it was just the opposite — I was interested but did not feel attracted to them. With each woman I dated, things ended as quickly as they began. In hindsight, the only thing I was clear on regarding the women I described was that I wanted to date and was initially attracted to them. Their age should have been a warning to me that we may have nothing in common. 

This experience taught me two things. The first is that age is not just a number. It is a fairly accurate measurement that describes where you have been and what is left in front of you. It tells you what you may have in common with someone. The second is to know what you are attracted to, understand what you want in a partner and a relationship, and confirm that these things are in agreement before you choose to spend time with someone. Now, I stay away from age extremes, and in those rare moments I meet someone extremely younger or older that I'm into, I look for common interests before committing to a date. This works for me because I recognize that age matters. It is simply naïve to think otherwise. 

She Said: I'll be honest here — I like 'em old. Save for my first boyfriend, who was just two years older than me, the men I've dated and clicked with have generally been anywhere from six to twenty years my senior. Now a twenty year age difference may not be the norm or "average" (neither is six, for that matter), but I hardly think it's a strong predictor for the success of a relationship (after all, nearly half of those couples with the "ideal" age difference between them get divorced), and it amuses me how shocked people continue to be about an age discrepancy. Do I think it's a great idea for 16-year-old Miley Cyrus to date a 20-year-old? Not necessarily, but I'll leave it up to the two people in the relationship to decided whether or not it works for them. 

Age itself isn't a factor in compatibility — it's elements like maturity and life experience, which tend to correlate with age, that can make or break a relationship's long-term potential. But so can future goals, background, culture, family, career, personality, and sexual chemistry. I tend to think that the combination of those factors (maturity and life experience included) takes precedence over whether or not your significant others gets your clever Beverly Hillbillies reference. And while we're at it, can we retire lingo like "cougar" and "cradle-robber" (or grave-robber, as I've been called) — it condescends both parties in question and is on par with sticking a cutesy label on someone who dates outside of their own race or background, in my opinion. 

Date and let date — unless you're currently involved in a triad relationship with the May-December couple you're commenting on, leave it to them to form opinions on how their age gap works for them. Age and maturity often go hand in hand, but you can certainly have one without the other. 

All that said, I do have one (admittedly hypocritical) rule when it comes to dating much older men. To weed out the creepsters, I always ask if they generally date women as young as me. If they make a habit of trolling for women at the local college campus, I move on. I want to be the exception, not the rule. 

http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/advice/age-difference-relationships

5 Sure Signs He's Into You

Dating and mating are SO much work sometimes! The guesswork of whether or not the guy you're crushing on is crushing on you back can leave you spiraling around, second-guessing his every interaction, trying to understand if he's actually into you.

Well, ladies, I'm here to help.

Here are some sure signs (from actual guys) that he's into you.

He bothers to call. I don't know how many times I sat by my phone (well before I had a cell phone), just waiting for the guy I was certain was in love with me to call. He didn't. I don't know how many excuses I made for him. And the next one. And the next one. They all had a "reason" in my head that they didn't call. You know what? That's bullshit. Any guy who wants to call you will call you. End of story.

He wants you to meet other people in his life. Maybe it's his friends. His roommate. His boss. His coworkers. His dog. Everyone. If he wants you to meet everyone from his mom to the guy who works at the convenience store below his apartment, he digs you.

He remembers all the quirky little things you say. When you hang out, he recalls that this one time you said you loved George Michael, and makes mention of it. Paying attention to small details like that is something dudes do when they like you.

He's looking at you -- a lot. You catch him looking at you. Watching you from across the room. Seeing the way you brush your hair from your forehead. He keeps his eyes on you. A guy who digs you wants to watch what you do, all the time.

He does things your way. It's your favorite diner. Your favorite coffee. Your favorite music on the stereo. If he's paying attention, he knows how you like things done and makes sure to do them that way.

What are some other sure signs that he's into you?

Ten Signs You are Dating the Wrong Person

We all have our dating doubts, but if you are experiencing any of the following issues, you could be investing time in the wrong person.

You Don't Feel Like You Can Be Yourself

Your friends tell you you've changed. You are always watching what you say or how you act, because your partner tends to get on your case or has been critical of you in the past. You just never feel completely relaxed around them, even after dating for a good amount of months. If you can't be who you truly are with your significant other, it's time to think hard about what you are doing in a situation like this...and why. No one is worth this much sacrifice.

You're Unhappy

While it's true that our partners aren't responsible for our happiness, they should certainly make our days a little brighter! Someone who is dating the right person consistently enjoys the relationship and feels a general sense of happiness (arguments aside!). If you find yourself unhappy most of the time -- and especially when you are with them -- then this may be a sign that this isn't the best person for you.

They Exhaust You

Instead of feeling energized after hanging out with your partner, you feel emotionally drained most of the time. They seem to always have something to complain about, or just have a negative outlook on life. Either way, the person you choose to spend your life with should really lift you up rather than drag you down. And it shouldn't feel like "work" most of the time.

The Friend Factor

If you are with someone and don't really want to introduce them to your friends, this is not a good sign (and you should ask yourself why!). If you are with someone and they never bring you around their friends, it's another sign. If your most trusted friends are expressing concern about your relationship, take heart. These people may be able to see things more objectively than you, so it's important to be open and hear what they have to say.

You Never Envision the Future Together

After a certain amount of time together, it is normal to start thinking about what the future might be like as a couple. If you have been with your partner for awhile and just don't see how it would ever work together down the line, it might be a good idea to evaluate why you are with this person and what you are really looking for.

You are Like Night and Day

He loves to go out every night and sleep late. You like to just be home and get an early start. He wants to be together seven nights a week, while you love time with your girlfriends. Compatibility is an essential ingredient for a happy and peaceful union, and if you and your partner have many fundamental differences, it may make things that much harder.

You're Not Excited to See or Hear From Them

She calls you...and you send it to voicemail. Or sometimes you actually avoid him. You realize that you feel completely ambivalent when you are around him. Many of us go through the motions and are so afraid to be alone that we stay in situations which aren't fulfilling. Dating should be fun, exciting and heartwarming, not another chore. It's not always going to be sunshine and roses, but you should feel happy to see them most of the time.

You Don't Feel Good about Yourself

In addition to feeling happy, a person in a good relationship usually has a positive self esteem. Sure, they will have some doubts and insecurities (who doesn't?), but the time they spend with their partner will make them feel better about themselves, not worse. In contrast, if your partner exacerbates your self doubts and undermines your confidence, it's time to stand up for yourself...and say see ya later!

The Cons of Staying Together Outweigh the Pros

A cost-benefit analysis can actually be helpful in situations other than at the office. Sit down for a few minutes and write down the advantages of staying with your partner. Then list the disadvantages. When you compare the lists, you will either find that the benefits outweigh any disadvantages, or that reasons to break up are more compelling than the ones to stay together.

Your Instincts are Whispering - Get Out

As a general rule, the voices inside us are there for a reason, and they should be listened to. Don't ignore the subtle red lights your subconcious is warning you about. Ultimately, our hearts know what is right for us. Give your inner voice free rein and let it direct you to the conclusions that are best for you.

Find someone who treats you like you need to be treated and makes you happy. Someone who makes you feel good about yourself, and whom the people you trust encourage you to be with. 

What have been the biggest signs for you that you were with the wrong person?

http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/ten-signs-you-are-dating-the-wrong-person/#.UuWMYxDFKM8

10 Ways to Mend a Broken Heart

Today’s news says that the average woman suffers heartbreak twice before meeting the right man. According to a new Eharmony survey, we’re likely to kiss 15 frogs, have four disastrous dates and two serious long-term relationships before settling down and meeting our ‘forever’ prince. With this in mind, we asked a team of relationship experts to come up with their definitive list of heartbreak remedies, so if we unexpectedly find ourselves heading towards dumpsville, we’re ready to deal (that’s without reaching for our fifteenth tub of Ben & Jerry’s...)

1. Avoid alcohol. 
When you first break up with somebody, you’ll feel shocked and probably in disbelief. The worst thing you can do is try and drown your emotions in alcohol and go mad on a big nights out – you’ll only end up sobbing to strangers or indulging on the dreaded drunk-calling (trust us, we’ve been there). 

2. Don’t contact him. 
You’ll go round in circles and get hurt. Instead, delete his number and when you get that urge to call him, phone a friend instead. 

3. Indulge in sad songs and films. 
As Jennifer Aniston said after her divorce from Brad Pitt, “When you try to avoid pain, it creates greater pain.” So remember to let those feelings out in a safe way (rather than say, sleeping with somebody else immediately – which will probably make you feel worse). 

4. Write him a letter. DEAR GOD DON'T SEND IT THOUGH.
After a week of wallowing, it’s time to address those emotions. Write him a letter explaining how hurt you are. Relive all the good and bad memories. Sign it, then burn it. It will feel hugely cathartic and you’ll feel like a weight has been lifted. 

5. Give yourself some distractions. 
Create a playlist full of upbeat, positive songs and start watching a new box set – something like 24 or Girls. Nothing too emotional or draining, but totally engrossing. 

6. Say YES to all social events. 
Just being out and about is healthy. Book time in advance with your friends to avoid feeling neglected and lonely in the upcoming weeks. 

7. Bin the bedding. 
Who wants reminding of them every time you wake up? Treat yourself to some new bed linen or you’ll always picture that duvet cover with a hairy foot sticking out from under it. Reclaim your boudoir! 

8. Unfriend him now. 
If you’re still friends on Facebook or Twitter, get rid – his entire life is played out before you in glorious Technicolour. Stop torturing yourself and unfollow/unfriend him today. Seeing pictures of him will act as a misery trigger, not to mention the hours you’ll waste trying to work out who those new female ‘friends’ are. No exceptions. 

9. Don’t rule out a rebound fling. 
Hooray. He doesn’t have to be Mr Perfect either – our experts say they can build confidence and remind you that you’re a sexual creature. But relax – you’re dating, not recruiting a husband – don’t let it stress you out. 

10. Seek out the positive. Although it’s hard to see it initially, there will be some serious pros to the split, trust us. Think of Nicole Kidman – who, when asked what you was looking forward to most about single life after splitting with Tom Cruise, replied, ‘Wearing high heels again’. What will you be gaining? Remind yourself.





http://www.cosmopolitan.co.uk/love-sex/relationships/ten-ways-to-get-over-someone

5 Reasons Why Falling In Love Is So Hard

Hitch (Widescreen Edition)

1. Labels terrify some people and uncertainty terrifies  

others.

For whatever reason, modern dating has become a foggy, confusing, vague limbo in which people are together when they’re physically together, but unclear what they are if they have so much as a wall between them. See, commitment issues or some ulterior motives keep many beating around the bush of “official.” They’ll avoid discussing or accepting any type of label by any means necessary. As a result, the other person involved is a confused, uncertain guy or gal, often left feeling fearful and uncomfortable, not knowing if that’s the person they’re WITH, or the person they’re with right now. Two scared people doesn’t result in one, successful love.

2. We see people getting screwed over so often.

It’s hard to trust anyone these days, and that stuff is kind of important in the preservation of a relationship. You’ve got to fully believe in the person you’re with, because you certainly can’t rely on home wrecking or unknowing folks to preserve your relationship, and refrain from attempting to get involved with your significant other. Friends, acquaintances, enemies, even family members have been a part of cheating scandals – we truly see it all these days. You simply have to have faith in the person you’re with to be loyal to you. I see some people who don’t trust their boyfriend or girlfriend in a room alone with their puppy, much less fighting off the temptation of another human being. Trust issues turn some people off, and so many people have them as a result of past experiences.

3. Some people are so, unbelievably shallow.

You can’t jump into the deep end with someone who’s swimming in the shallow. I mean, you can, but I wouldn’t recommend it. If someone is all about looks, they may lust for you, but if you have serious feelings on your side, that’s a recipe for disaster. Anyone who can be turned off enough to terminate a connection because of body hair, weight, or aesthetics in general isn’t worthy of you to begin with. Unfortunately, being well aware that so many people care so much about appearances can make a person extra cautious. There are just so many ridiculous body expectations enforced by shallow people that make others hate themselves and have no confidence, which can become an impediment in the process of love.

4. Quitting is easier than fixing.

Relationships can take a lot of work and unfortunately people aren’t always willing to put in effort, resulting in breakups over the tiniest qualms and minutiae. Maybe people have watched so many movies that they’ve come to believe love should start out amazing, then in act two there’s a little bit of drama, but after that’s hashed out, everything is just peachy. Couples disagree. They argue, they get annoyed and exhausted of one another’s BS, and they have struggles, but life isn’t a Nicholas Sparks novel. If two people want to be with each other, shouldn’t the concept of splitting up be eliminated all together? It should never even be an option. Breaking up shouldn’t be done every other week. Relationships, like many other things, require maintenance and an effort.

5. Because falling in love isn’t hard at all. It’s the getting 

back up after your heart has been smashed into a 

million tiny pieces that’s so brutal.

In reality, falling in love with someone can happen naturally and effortlessly. It typically doesn’t go down like Family Matters, with Steve Urkel aggressively pursuing Laura for years before finally forcing an unlikely love to exist. In real life it often happens before we even have a chance to realize we’re vulnerable. If you’re a guarded person, surely you’re well aware when there’s been a security breach in the heavily protected area known as your feelings. Alarms are ringing and you’re proceeding with all of the caution, because all you can remember is how helpless you felt after the previous heartbreak. Once you know what a broken heart feels like, it’s never easy to give another person the power to put you through that same, excruciating experience. 

http://thoughtcatalog.com/christopher-hudspeth/2013/04/5-reasons-why-falling-in-love-is-so-hard/

Online Dating Profile Clichés to Avoid – and How to Write an Original Profile

Ever skimmed a dating profile and seen one or more of these lines?

• “I love to travel.”
• “I’m laid back, easy-going, and love to have a good time.”
• “I’m looking for someone honest, caring and kind.”
• “I don’t really know what to write on one of these things.”
• “My family is really important to me.”

They sound pretty familiar, right? That’s because you’ve seen them, or their variations, on numerous dating profiles.

You expect to see one or more every time you visit a new page – the same old lines about looking for someone with a sense of humour, or how people notice their eyes, or about how they’re not too sure how to describe themselves.

It can get pretty boring reading the same clichés over and over, and after a while it becomes hard to distinguish one profile from another. “Which guy was this one again? The one who loves hanging out with his friends on a Friday night?”

By the same token, it’s extremely refreshing when you come across a profile that doesn’t feature these tried and tired phrases. When someone’s taken the time out to make their page even just a little bit original, it’s like water in the desert – a reminder that not everyone out there’s saying the same four things about themselves and what they’re looking for.

But why are these clichés such a turn-off, and how can you avoid using them in your own dating profile? After all – if your goal is to attract people, you want to create a profile that really stands out. And that’s going to take a little bit more thought than just posting a few pictures and talking about how you love to have fun.

What’s an online dating cliché?

When we talk about clichés, we’re referring to the same overused few lines people tend to use when talking about themselves on their dating profiles. They’re generic, obvious statements that appear time and time again in the profiles of men and women the world over.

Clichés are overused for good reason. More often than not, they’re true. Lots of people do love to travel, go out on a Friday night, enjoy a beer after work or work out at the gym. And it’s important to be honest about the things you enjoy doing and what you’re looking for in a date.

We’re not advocating that you start talking about your love of Russian opera or your time spent in a yurt in Tibet just so you can appear “original”. We’re just here to suggest other ways to say something that people will find familiar. Because, if you hear a cliché too many times, you start to doubt it’s true.

The classic online dating clichés

• “Stop me if you’ve heard this one before… “
• “I’m equally as comfortable in jeans and a T-shirt as I am in a cocktail dress and heels.”
• “The most important things in my life are my iPhone and my family… not in that order.”
• “I love going out, but I’m just as happy staying in.”
• “People tend to notice my eyes and my smile.”
• “There’s no such thing as a typical Friday night for me.”
• “I work hard and play hard.”
• “I’m shy at first, until you get to know me.”
• “I’m terrible at talking about myself.”
• “I’m looking for someone who knows what he/she wants.”
• “I’m looking for a partner in crime.”
• “I’m looking for someone with a great sense of humour.”
• “I like to have fun and enjoy life.”
• “I hate playing games and I don’t want any drama.”

It’s hard to tell what this girl’s really like because there’s nothing about the above to distinguish her from other users.

So what’s so bad about clichés, anyway?

Now you may be reading the above and thinking, “Well, what’s so bad about saying that? It’s true, isn’t it?” You may even be wondering whether you, too, might have used some of the above phrases when talking about yourself online. But they can often be a turn-off for other users.

Here’s why:

• They make you sound boring: Talking about how much you love the beach or how you’re looking for someone who can make you laugh gives others the impression that there’s nothing particularly special about you, and that you like the same generic things everybody else likes.
• They make you sound predictable: Dating is all about the excitement of discovering new things about a new person. All humans are complex, multi-layered beings with so many different characteristics. Don’t give someone the impression they can figure you out just by reading your “about me” section.
• They make you sound like you haven’t put in any effort: If nothing else, clichés are lazy. A profile littered with the same old tired lines about your pets or your iPhone just makes the writer sound uninterested in taking the process seriously.
• They don’t get you attention: Users whose profiles are heavy on the clichés tend to get fewer messages and responses than those whose profiles show thought, originality and a genuine sense of humour.

How to say it better

While there’s nothing wrong with using a couple of these lines when you genuinely know them to be true, there’s almost always a better way to say the same thing. Here are a few ways to avoid writing the same thing as everybody else and make your profile to stand out:

• Be specific: Talk about your interests in detail, rather than generally. For example, talk about eating fish and chips by the ocean at sunset instead of just saying you love the beach. If you love working out, talk about training for a marathon or hiking in the mountains rather than just going to the gym. Don’t just say you love to read. Tell us about the last great book you read and why it made you think.
• Be cheeky: Make light-hearted references to those clichés you’ve been learning to hate. You could write something like, “I’m not into games. Unless of course you mean Scrabble… in which case you better bet I’ll beat you.” Readers will be relieved to know you’re not completely oblivious and they’ll feel like you’re in on the joke.
• Be honest and sincere: If you really take the time to sincerely write about yourself, you may be surprised to learn you can come up with original, honest and meaningful things to say about yourself and what you’re looking for in a partner. Part of the frustration with clichés is they seem insincere or disingenuous.
• Tell a story: Give your readers a chance to get to know you on a deeper level by sharing witty anecdotes from your life. It doesn’t have to be anything too personal – just a few lines about a moment in your life that was important to you.

Here are a few examples of clichéd responses on dating profiles and ways in which to edit them to make them sound a little more original:

Example #1:

This user has listed a few interests that sound very generic – everybody loves doing at least one of these activities when they have time off.

Try…

Example #2:

Not only is this answer completely uninteresting, it’s also too short to get a sense of what they’re really looking for. Again – this user hasn’t spent much time thinking of a creative or unique answer, which is a turn-off.

Try…

Example #3:

This answer REALLY doesn’t give the reader much to work with, and makes the user look like they’re too lazy to come up with anything original or interesting. They also sound disinterested in online dating in general, which sort of defeats the purpose.

Try…

When in doubt, try thinking about the ways in which your friends would describe you – or better yet, just ask them! This response isn’t cliché because it comes across as genuine and sincere. So even though the words themselves are not drastically original, the user has clearly put thought and effort into crafting their response, which piques the reader’s interest and makes them want to learn more.

Last but not least

The most appealing thing you can do when creating your dating profile is just to be yourself. Let your guard down and let yourself push past beyond the words that come most easily. While online dating isn’t therapy, it is a great way to learn more about yourself and what you want in a partner. You’ll avoid being a cliché by being sincere, honest and open, and other users will notice and appreciate it.

If you found this advice useful or have any additional thoughts, why not share it on Facebook or email it to a friend?

http://www.eharmony.co.uk/relationship-advice/start-with-you/2013/12/online-dating-profile-cliches-to-avoid-and-how-to-write-an-original-profile#.UshVS_RdXnc